Today's visual inspiration

I love the textural quality of this. Can you guess what and where it is?

Lessons from the garden: Weeding, pruning, and thinning

When I first began gardening, I thought mostly about adding to the garden (that is, putting in plants), but a big part of gardening involves subtracting from the garden through weeding, pruning and thinning. These are still the tasks I have trouble with, but they are important components in all aspects of life.

• Weeding: Weeding is about eliminating unwanted volunteer plants. Weeds are constantly cropping up, and they have a tendency to crowd out the desirable plants, leaching away water and nutrients and creating a messy look to the garden. So we pull them up. The lesson here is to be vigilant in looking for weeds in our own lives. Are there projects or commitments or activities or habits that you don't want, that are stealing energy and time from your goals and priorities? If so, it may be time to uproot and eliminate those unwanted aspects of your life. But remember that something may seem like a weed to one person, but not to another. I am determined to uproot every pokeweed plant in my garden, but I have a friend who loves to watch the birds feast on its berries. To me it is a weed, but not to her. Just because something may seem like a waste of time to others, doesn't mean you must eliminate it -- you are the only one who can determine whether it is unwanted in your life. And sometimes, the unintentional plants are a delightful contribution to the garden -- I'm happy to see the petunias that re-seeded from last year's plants, even though I didn't intend for them to be there. Just because something is unplanned, doesn't mean that it is necessarily unwanted.
• Pruning: Even desirable plants need to be cut back from time to time. Not only do we cut away the dead wood, but we cut them back to make them smaller, to train them to a particular shape, to encourage more vigorous blooming. Pruning helps maintain healthy plants and keeps them from overgrowing the space. Yet I find it difficult to motivate myself to prune -- the holly gets bigger and bigger, but isn't that good? The rose brambles take over an entire corner of the garden, but how could that be bad? Yet now the holly is pressing against the house, and that spectacular rose now shades the lavender and coneflower. Even desirable parts of our lives can become too big and unwieldy and may begin to crowd out other goals. Sometimes we need to check the balance in our life, to make sure that some activities or commitments haven't exceeded the space we meant to allocate to them. I have always enjoyed baking, but at one point, I had so many people on my holiday cookie list that I ended up baking cookies for days on end. What had been enjoyable became a chore; I needed to scale back, to prune. Is there something in your life that has grown too big?
• Thinning: Every year, I put in vegetables from seed: carrots, kohlrabi, radishes. I sprinkle the seeds in the ground and am rewarded with rows of tiny seedlings. This is when I'm supposed to thin the plants -- to remove enough of the seedlings so that the remaining ones have space to grow. Every year, I resist thinning. How can I remove perfectly healthy plants and throw them on the compost heap? I pull a few and then give up, figuring the rest of them can fight it out. But by being unwilling to thin out the plants, I doom the whole lot of them to become thin and pallid, unable to develop fully. This really is the hardest lesson for me. I want to be able to do everything, to teach and research and sew and bead and dance and read and garden and cook and bake and write and take art classes and learn Arabic . . . but I can't do it all. If I try, I end up doing a little of everything rather poorly, or taking on commitments I can't fulfill. I have to be willing to prioritize, to thin out the activities that are less important, so that I can achieve my goals. I struggle with this constantly, and I keep hoping that I don't have to thin. Maybe all those carrots will do just fine on their own. Right? The garden keeps trying to teach me to cut back, to eliminate, to clear space for what matters. Maybe one day I'll actually learn that lesson.

Lessons from the Garden: It takes work

I've been doing an inordinate amount of gardening this summer, and I think I'm seeing connections between gardening and the rest of my life. Today's insights are all about the work involved in gardening:

• Be prepared for ongoing maintenance work. While there are some things in life that one can finish and be done with, most require ongoing maintenance: Touch up that paint job, work on your relationship, feed the dog. Every time I turn around, the garden needs to be weeded . . . or mulched, or aerated, or whatever. I don't think I knew when I started this how much ongoing labor is required to keep up a garden.
• Some tasks aren't fun. No matter how many (many!) times I weed, I never really enjoy it -- it's sweaty, grueling, unrewarding work. Again, this is true in so many areas of my life: no matter how much I enjoy something, there are always some parts of it that I just have to slog through.
• It always takes you longer than you think. I may go out with the idea that I will weed the entire front garden that day, but I'm lucky if I can get a quarter of that done in a day. This is a lesson I never seem to learn -- with every project I undertake, it invariably takes me *much* longer than I expect (this is known as the planning fallacy).
• Putting effort in early on can save you effort later. If I were to really weed thoroughly in the early spring, there would be fewer weeds later in the summer. But I never have enough time to do a thorough spring weeding, so I pay for it later with many more hours of weeding. This isn't true of all things in life, but it's worth remembering for some things.
• You don't have to do it all yourself. I do most of the gardening work myself, but I have a landscaper come in to do things that I don't have time, skill, or tools for -- I have them do tree planting and pruning, for example. And then, of course, Q has been a huge help -- not only does he help me weed sometimes, but he spent hours putting in our new, wonderful paths. Again, this is a lesson it's hard for me to learn -- I tend to think I have to do everything myself, but there is no shame in getting help from others.

Beaded bellydance belt

I finished beading this belt last year, but never got around to taking pictures. I'm working on the matching bra at the moment. Click on the pictures if you want to see them full-size (the details are clearer in the larger versions of the pictures).

The front of the belt

Detail of the central motif on the front of the belt. I sewed on every bead and sequin individually -- these are not appliques. The motifs are a mix of glass seed beads of various clear and silvery tones, Swarovski crystals, and Czech glass beads, edged in sequins and more glass beads. The top edge of the belt is edged in bugle beads and sequins.


Detail of the fringe. I designed the fringe and sewed all the beads on individually; it's a mix of silver-lined, glass seed beads and three types of Swarovski crystals.


The back of the belt.

The back of the belt; the angled shot gives a sense of the dimensionality of the beading.

Detail of the central motif on the back of the belt.

This beading takes an amazingly long time to complete and I can't even estimate the number of hours or the number of beads in the project. But I love the way it came out.

Various projects

Summer projects have begun! I have been working in the garden a lot (weather permitting). There are a number of lovely new pathways, thanks to Q (yay!), so I've been trying to design within the new structure. For all my effort, the front garden needs another weeding, a few more plants, and some mulch, but for now it houses a baby bunny most days, so I am content. The back garden has some vegetables and a few flowers, but I still need to work some beds and put some more vegetables and flowers in. I put in some new shade plants in the beds along the house, which were looking a bit unkempt. The deck strawberries have been producing a bit of fruit (yum!), and the Alpine strawberries have been fairly prolific. The first crop of raspberries is just starting to ripen, and I put in two new blueberry bushes. So I'm running a bit late in the garden, but it is slowly getting done.

I made my first bellydance costume bra from scratch this week. I ended up making muslins of three different sizes of a Kwik Sew underwire bra, none of which fit perfectly. There was some gapping in the cup under the arm, so I just put in a dart there, and I cut down the center connecting piece a bit. I think the sizes run a bit big, because the cup is bigger than I am used to. For the final version, I wanted it to be sturdy enough to take a lot of beading without collapsing. So I made the main bra out of reinforced denim (from old jeans) with some stiff interfacing, and then I created the front cup section out of two layers of buckram and fusible fleece and basted that into the denim bra. It is super sturdy! Then I made another version of the bra in the velvet I am using for the costume and covered the bra with the velvet (with hand basting). Now I'm beading it, which will take a bit of time, but is the part I like the best. I'm repeating motifs from the belt, but changing them around a bit. I finished beading the belt a while ago; it just needs to be lined and sized for me (have the hooks sewn in). It's been quite a while since I've had a new dance costume, so I am eager to finish this one.

There are a couple of home repair/renovation projects that need to be finished, too, so I've been calling contractors and trying to get those underway. Hopefully soon! Then there will be some painting to do when they are done.

It's amazing how busy I feel, given that I'm on summer break. There is always so much to do!

Dreaming of electric jellyfish

Scene from last night's dream: I found a jellyfish in the sink that my father had given me. It looked dead, and I felt bad for forgetting about it. I picked it up and took it over to a freestanding bin that was filled with water had a rounded opening on its front face, which had also been a gift from my father. I tossed the jellyfish in, and it swelled up and began flitting around. When it touched the front open panel, the edges of the opening glowed and there was an electric spark (like the force fields in Star Trek). Water splashed out, all over the floor, but the jellyfish couldn't get out. I had a vague sense of menace or danger from the jellyfish, were it to escape. I went to get a sponge to clean up the water. I have no idea what it means, but I like the vivid imagery.

The torture debate

I've been following the discussion of the "enhanced interrogation techniques" in the last few weeks, in part because of the involvement of some psychologists in crafting these techniques for the Defense Department. In an interview on NPR, one of the military psychologists involved states that these interrogation techniques were fully justified in view of the need to protect America against future terrorist attacks -- in his view, psychologists are not constrained to "do no harm", but rather that they should do "the most good for the most people." The involvement of psychologists in these harsh interrogation practices has been the cause of a strong response within the American Psychological Association, including a restatement of their stance against torture, and a revision in the code of ethics for psychologists. Now there is a call for an investigation into the American Psychological Association's ethics task force, with the accusation that this task force was biased in favor of the Defense Department and that the ethics policy was crafted to conform to Pentagon guidelines. The debate over these harsh interrogation practices has generally focused on two questions: Are these practices morally and/or legally justifiable, and do they work? Let me leave the first question aside for the moment; important as it is, I want to unpack the second question. In general, the "do the techniques work" discussion has been narrowly focused on whether these techniques provide useful intelligence and whether they are necessary for getting such information. That is, do detainees spill the secrets (of other operatives and future attack plans) when they are waterboarded or held in stress positions, and would they have done so if they hadn't been waterboarded or held in stress positions? There has been a significant conflict between those like Cheney who argue that important intelligence was gathered through harsh interrogation techniques that saved thousands of American lives, and the recent testimony of an ex-FBI agent who said that these tactics were unreliable and ineffective. I would argue that torture does not reliably result in accurate or complete information, but rather, the person says whatever they think will make the pain stop. That *might* include useful information, but it might also be incomplete or even be false. President Obama (among others) has also questioned Cheney's reading of the relevant documents, challenging the notion that these techniques were necessary or effective in gathering information. But what seems to be missing in this discussion is what the effect is within the broader international context. If the wake of the Abu Ghraib scandal, there was a great deal of discussion about how these abuses would foster or enhance an anti-American sentiment and might inspire more to join terrorist groups. If our harsh treatment of detainees inspires more to join the ranks of terrorist organizations, then wouldn't it be possible that these interrogation tactics served not to save American lives, but to endanger them?

Weekend activities

On Friday and Saturday, I finally got back to my textile studio after a long hiatus. I did some straightening up and putting things away to clear working space, and then I started a lacy stitched scarf. I laid down a sheet of adhesive, water soluble stabilizer, put various ribbons and yarns on the stabilizer, and then laid another sheet of water soluble stabilizer on top. I used rayon ribbons, chenille yarn, recycled silk sari yarn, and some other fun yarns as well, in a mixture of jewel tones. Then I stitched a grid pattern over the whole thing to keep it all together. As an experiment, I decided to free-motion stitch over the grid pattern in circles with metallic thread (purple and gold). I'm not sure how much it will show up, but I wanted a kind of delicate texture of circles over the gridded structure of yarns. I won't know how it will look until I wash out the stabilizer. I also think I made the scarf too short, so I may cut it apart and insert some sections of more open ribbon work to extend the length and give it more drape (I suspect all the stitching will make it a bit stiffer). I didn't finish the circles because the gold thread kept tangling -- I broke 3 needles, and decided to quit after that. But it was great fun, and I can't wait to get back to it. I'll put up some pictures when I'm done.

Sunday, Q and I laid out the pavers for the pathways in the back garden (we had the vegetable garden part enlarged, and now it needs some hardscaping). We started out with the idea of a symmetrical design, but it evolved into a more flowing, organic design which looks fabulous. Yay for Q's design skills! The garden looks so much better with the pathway lines running through it. We still have all the hard work of digging the pathway and setting the pavers, but I think it will look terrific when it is done. And then I can put in the vegetable garden. Yay for tomatoes and basil and carrots and eggplant and beans and . . .

On an unrelated note, can someone explain why I still have some of my 10th grade chemistry worksheets? What on earth made me decide to keep them? Am I allowed to get rid of them, or do they constitute some kind of important memorabilia?

Only two more weeks until the semester is done. I have so many papers to grade by then!

New blogging project

In honor of Mother's Day, I just wanted to let you know about my new blog, Memories of My Mother, where I will be posting weekly explorations of memories of my mother. This project represents an exercise in mindfulness, as I spend some time each week reflecting on my mother's life. In addition to the regular blog posts, I'm raising funds toward a college scholarship in her name at Montgomery College(as part of the Women's Studies Scholarship program). All net proceeds from sales of my handcrafted goods in my Etsy shop will go toward the Nancy Driessel Stearns scholarship fund. Right now, there is only one item in my Etsy shop, but more will be listed in future, so check back regularly to see what I have available. The project is described more fully on the blog, so if you are interested, pop over and read about it there. Feel free to post comments, if you are so moved. There are links on the blog to subscribe via a reader or via email (to have new posts emailed to you), as well as a link to my Etsy shop (on the right hand menu).

Happy Mother's Day!

Weird (musical?) instrument

I heard on Wait Wait Don't Tell Me about this early pre-cursor to the Muppaphone . . .the Pig Organ. From Everything2.com:

The Pig Organ was another such combination of Louis' two loves. 17th-century writer Nathaniel Wanley describes it better than I ever could: "The Abbot of Baigne, a man of great wit, and who had the art of inventing new musical instruments, being in the service of Louis XI, king of France, was ordered by that prince to get him a concert of swine's voices, thinking it impossible. The abbot was not surprised, but asked for money for the performance, which was immediately delivered him; and he wrought a thing as singular as ever was seen. For out of a great number of hogs, of several ages, which he got together, and placed under a tent or pavillion, covered with velvet, before which he had a table of wood, painted, with a certain number of hogs, he made an organical instrument, and as he played upon the said keys, with little spikes which pricked the hogs he made them cry in such order and consonance, as highly delighted the king and all his company." In the mid-19th century, this idea was resurrected by the inventor of the so-called Porco-Forte instrument, which pinched the tails of pigs to elicit their squeals.

I still like the Muppaphone better.